Bitterne Manor Primary School is committed to creating an environment where exemplary behaviour is at the heart of productive learning. Everyone is expected to maintain the highest standards of personal conduct, to accept responsibility for their behaviour and encourage others to do the same. Our behaviour policy guides staff to teach self-discipline not blind compliance. It echoes our core values with a heavy emphasis on respectful behaviour, a partnership approach to managing poor conduct and dynamic interventions that support staff and learners.

The school has 3 simple rules ‘Be Ready, Be Respectful and Be Safe’ which can be applied to a variety of situations and are taught and modelled explicitly.

We also understand that for some children following our behaviour expectations are beyond their developmental level. In this case, these children will have bespoke positive behaviour plans which may include rewards to reinforce positive behaviour.

In our school...

We do the best we can.

We are ready to learn.

We look after eachother and

our environment.

We are friendly, polite

and work together.

We have fun and stay safe.

A Relational Policy

“You can be strict without being nasty, maintain boundaries without cruelty and correct children without aggression”. Paul Dix, Pivotal Education

“I strongly believe that deep down in every child, however invisible, hostile or rejecting they may seem, is a deep longing to be seen, known and truly understood” Louise Bomber 2007

“As adults we have a shared ethical responsibility in ensuring that all children and young people are experiencing safety, security and stability – whatever our role or context” L.Bomber, 2012

Aim of the policy

• To create a culture of exceptionally good behaviour: for learning, for community, for life.
• To ensure that all learners are treated fairly, shown respect and to promote good relationships.
• To refuse to give learners attention and importance for poor conduct.
• To help learners take control over their behaviour and be responsible for the consequences of it.
• To build a community which values kindness, care, good humour, good temper, obedience and empathy for others.
• To promote community cohesion through improved relationships.
• To ensure that excellent behaviour is a minimum expectation for all.

Our aims, we believe, are achieved when:

• We create a positive school culture and climate which is consistent, safe and caring that fosters connection, inclusion, respect and value for all members of the school community, promoting strong relationships between staff, pupils and their parents/carers
• We recognise that being ‘fair’ is not about everyone getting the same (equality) but about everyone getting what they need (equity) through appropriate support.
• Staff understand that behaviour is a form of communication of an emotional need (whether conscious or unconscious). With support to self-regulate through unconditional positive regard, pupils can be helped to behave in more socially acceptable/appropriate ways. That relationships are key and that there is “connection before correction”
• Pupils are provided with excellent role models (alternative attachment figures who provide a secure base and the connection necessary to support correction)
• Not all behaviours are a matter of ‘choice’ and not all factors linked to the behaviour of pupils is within their control. Therefore, the language of choice (e.g. ‘good choice/bad choice’) is not always helpful.
• Staff use PACE and attachment friendly restorative approaches in their interactions with pupils taking a non-judgmental, curious and empathic attitude towards behaviour, responding in a way that focuses on the feelings and emotions that might drive certain behaviour, rather than the behaviour itself. Children and young people with behavioural difficulties need to be regarded as vulnerable rather than troublesome, and we all have a duty to explore this vulnerability
• Staff have high expectations and maintain boundaries at all times to ensure pupil needs for consistency, predictability and security are met. Changing how we respond to behaviour does not mean having no expectations, routines or structure. In order to help our pupils feel safe, their educational environment needs to be high in both nurture and structure. Our pupils need predictable routines, expectations and responses to behaviour. These must be in place and modelled appropriately, within the context of a safe and caring school environment.

Restorative Practice at Bitterne Manor Primary School

Definition

The aim of restorative practices is to develop community and to manage conflict and tensions by repairing harm and building relationships.

Restorative Practices in Schools is about:

• building safer schools
• changing behaviour not punishing
• adults modelling restorative approaches
• finding ways to repair harm
• supporting staff, children and families to use RP to build community

Why use a restorative approach?

• Punishment doesn’t meet needs of those who suffered
• May be kudos or ‘street cred’ attached to the punishment
• Offenders don’t have to face full effects of actions
• Offender may feel isolated and it may be difficult for them to get back into school
• community, making rule-breaking more attractive
• If problem behaviour persists, child may be pushed down a road of exclusion and marginalisation. They may be removed from school, but remain a problem in the wider community

Restorative Questions 1

To respond to challenging behaviour:

• What happened?
• What were you thinking about at the time?
• What have your thoughts been since?
• Who has been affected by what you did?
• In what way have they been affected?
• What do you think you need to do to make things right?

Restorative Questions 2

To help those harmed by others’ actions:

• What did you think when you realised what had happened?
• What have your thoughts been since?
• How has this affected you and others?
• What had been the hardest thing for you?
• What do you need to do to make things right?

Dan Hughes’ PACE Approach

PACE refers to Playfulness, Acceptance, Curiosity and Empathy:

Playfulness involves spontaneity, openness and exploration; have fun and share enjoyment with the pupil. Using playfulness can defuse tense situations and is useful to manage minor behaviours, as the pupil is less likely to respond with anger or defensiveness.

Acceptance involves unconditional positive regard for the pupil. Accept the pupil’s inner experience without judgement and make sense of why the pupil is behaving in a certain way. Acceptance does not mean accepting negative behaviours, but accepting the reasons behind behaviour. When necessary criticise the behaviour, but not the pupil.

Curiosity involves wondering about the reasons behind the behaviours, rather than being angry. This shows the pupil that you care and helps them make sense of their behaviour,feelings and experiences. Use phrases like “I wonder if you are feeling like this because…” to open up discussions with the pupil.

Empathy involves showing them that you understand how difficult they are finding things and reassuring them that you want to help them to manage this. Validate the pupil’s emotional experience with phrases such as “I know how difficult that must have been for you” and work together to find ways to support them.

For more information about the PACE approach please refer to literature by Dan Hughes.

Examples of PACE used with pupils at Bitterne Manor Primary School

Situation: Pupil in heightened state of anxiety, attempting to climb the perimeter railings and not following instructions to come down.

Application of PACE:

• Playfulness – Use playful language to de-escalate the situation. "Goodness me I really would rather you came down. Problem is that if you fall I will have to fill out a lot of forms and I'm a bit like you - I don't really like writing."
• Acceptance - the pupil is experiencing extreme anxiety as a result of a fall out with a friend and that this is a real experience. Communicate that you accept how they feel (e.g. “I can see that this has made you feel really upset”). Avoiding saying things like, "Oh it doesn't matter, don't be upset about a silly fall out."
• Curiosity- Enquire and check what the young person's emotional experience is. "I wonder if you're feeling in the red zone because of what X just said?"
• Empathy - Show that you understand that how difficult they are finding things. "I understand that this must be really difficult for you. I know that when I am feeling upset I just want to run away from everything."

Using PACE and a calm approach, the pupil's anxiety decreased and they came down off the railings. They went with an adult to the Sensory Room. Instead of imposing consequences, once the pupil was calm, a discussion was had about the dangers of climbing the railings. The pupil was able to reflect on their behaviour and think of alternative things they could do next time.

Colour Monsters and Zones of Regulation

The Zones of Regulation is an internationally renowned intervention which helps children to manage difficult emotions, known as ‘self-regulation’. Self-regulation can go by many names such as ‘self-control’, ‘impulse management’ and ‘self-management’. Self-regulation is best described as the best state of alertness for a situation. For example, when a child takes part in a sports game, they would need to have a higher state of alertness than when, for example, they were working in a library. From time to time, all of us (including adults) find it hard to manage strong feelings such as worry, anger, restlessness, fear or tiredness, and this stops us from getting on with our day effectively. Children who feel these emotions often find it hard to learn and concentrate in school. The Zones of Regulation aims to teach children strategies to help them cope with these feelings so they can get back to feeling calm and ready to learn. These coping strategies are called ‘self-regulation’.

We want to teach all of our children good coping and regulation strategies so they can help themselves when they experience anxiety and stress. In the classroom, sometimes children panic when faced with a tricky learning problem or challenge. By teaching them how to cope with these feelings might make them better at tackling learning challenges and build better resilience so they don’t give up so easily when faced with difficulty.

We want children to grow into successful teenagers, then adults. Teaching the children at a young age about managing their feelings will support them in later life so that they don’t turn to negative coping strategies which affect their mental and physical wellbeing.

We aim to help children to:

• Recognise when they are in the different Zones and learn how to change or stay in the Zone they are in.

• Increase their emotional vocabulary so they can explain how they are feeling.

• Recognise when other people are in different Zones, thus developing better empathy.

• Develop an insight into what might make them move into the different Zones.

• Understand that emotions, sensory experiences such as lack of sleep or hunger and their environment might influence which Zone they are in.

• Develop problem-solving skills and resilience

• Identify a range of calming and alerting strategies that support them (known as their personal ‘toolkit’.

What are the different Zones?

Blue Zone: low level of arousal; not ready to learn; feels sad, sick, tired, bored, moving slowly.

Green Zone: calm state of alertness; optimal level to learn; feels happy, calm, feeling okay, focused.

Yellow Zone: heightened state of alertness; elevated emotions; has some control; feels frustrated, worried, silly/wiggly, excited, loss of some control.

Red Zone: heightened state of alertness and intense emotions; not an optimal level for learning; out of control; feels mad/angry, terrified, yelling/hitting, elated, out of control.

We will teach the children that everyone experiences all of the Zones. The Red and Yellow zones are not ‘bad’ or ‘naughty’ Zones. All of the Zones are expected at one time or another. We will show them that the Blue Zone, for example, is helpful when you are trying to fall asleep.

Colour Monster by Anna Llenas

In the lower part of the school we introduce pupils to the story of the ‘Colour Monster’ to help them understand their emotions.

'The Colour Monster'  teaches children about feelings, as each beautiful colour leads to an emotion. It helps children build understanding and empathy towards others, as in the story the emotions are attached to deep descriptions of how the little furry Monster feels inside.

YELLOW - HAPPINESS.

BLUE - SADNESS.

RED - ANGER.

BLACK - FEAR.

GREEN - CALM.

PINK - LOVE.

Neuro Diversity in School

We acknowledge that pupils have a range of needs and have an awareness that certain behaviours are a communication of that need. It is important that support is in place for neuro diverse pupils. This can take various forms:

• A flexible approach to school uniform ie joggers instead of trousers, looser fitting tops.
• Quiet spaces available for regulation in or around the classroom.
• More time to process instructions.
• Adjustments for sensory challenges ie access to ear defenders and other sensory equipment.
• Routine and structure reducing anxiety ie access to visual timetables or now/next boards